The irony is that dispute resolution coaching often provides a far more real and rewarding outcome compared to other resolution methods, even though the other party isn't directly involved in arriving at the resolution.
There is power in taking responsibility for everything that occurs in one’s own life, especially when it seems like the other party is entirely at fault. Yet, it’s not obvious how to handle a dispute, whether you feel you need to stand up for a principle, or whether you are accused falsely of something you know you didn’t do. Sometimes it’s best to forgive and forget; other times, going to war via litigation may be morally justified as well as financially prudent.
These choices become particularly confusing when you have a strong conviction that you are right, and you want to stand up as a matter of principle, and/or for the sake of others who may come after you. The problem is, how do you really know you are right? Wars are often fought because of inflexibly clinging to the notion of one's own "right-ness" without regarding the truth of the other side's point of view. It may seem the moral and courageous thing to do, and maybe it is. But what if you’re actually part of the problem rather than the solution? What if you want to stand up for principle, but the law is not on your side? Do you forge new territory at your own expense? How do you even know what you want? Are you letting your emotions gett the better of you?
These are not easy issues. Unfortunately, the legal system has become increasingly detached from resolving disputes on the basis of these difficult moral questions, and has become more about quickly defining winners and losers, not seeking truth and justice. Dispute resolution coaching engages all this complexity by keeping the client committed to and aligned with their own sense of what is important, their own believes and values, and without losing site of practical and legal realities of their unique situation.
Dispute resolution coaching can:
- Help you find clarity about what to do by identifying and defining the issue to be resolved
- Understand the strengths and weeknesses of your legal case
- Learn to create positive communications and working relationships
- Explore what you can do to change the dynamic of a situation
- Develop options for a collaborative resolution
- Prepare for the challengs of entering the legal system
TRY DISPUTE RESOLUTION COACHING
Next time you're in a legal battle or dispute, consider weather dispute resolution coaching is a better alternative for you.
Dispute resolution is not mediation or litigation. In fact it works where mediation fails, because mediation requires two parties to come to the table and authentically want to settle their agreement.
Dispute resolution coaching is a new way of resolving conflicts and disputes that combines the risk and cost-benefit conversations of traditional lawyering with the moral and practical advantages of taking 100% responsibility for what is so.
IngenaLaw is pioneering a new ways of resolving disputes outside the courtroom, outside of the mediator's office, and especially, outside the norm.
If you want to "do the right thing" instead of "win at all costs"
If you want to get on with your life in peace and serenity instead of engage in war
If you accept the idea that it is up to you to be the change you want to see in the world
If there is also a part of you that needs to know how to think about fairness and justice to yourself
Then call now for a free consultation about dispute resolution coaching
Dispute resolution coaching is an alternative to litigation, arbitration and mediation. Much praise has been given to these alternative dispute resolution mechanisms, but also much criticism, particularly with arbitration. Whatever their pros or cons, mediation and arbitration are still probably better than litigation in most instances, although some claim that arbitration is often worse than litigating in court.
Nonetheless, each of the big three are more alike than they are different. The two main distinctions of dispute resolution coaching from all other methods of resolving disputes is that (1) it can be effective even with only one participant; (2) it arises from an entirely different set of assumptions than litigation and the major alternatives to litigation. These assumptions arise out of warlike goals and worldviews. By contrast, dispute resolution coaching rejects the values and assumptions of war, and instead adopts a context of peace-building.
Context and Assumptions of Litigation and War
The analogy to war is not capricous. The US and English legal systems are called "adverserial" systems. The adversarial system arose out of a duel to the death between two opponents. The assumption was that divine intervention would determine a just result; that the surviving victor represented which side was virtuous and just. Of course, great pains were taken to ensure the opponents were equally armoured and geared up for battle. Thus, the underpinning of our entire legal system came out of a focus on war.
What is evident to this date of the warlike values and beliefs that became the foundation of our legal systerm are the assumptions that remain. Specificially, the assumptions that remain in the legal system (including the major alternatives to litigation) include: (1) that people tend to be either good or evil; (2) that a person's actions are either right or wrong and justice demands determining who is right and who is wrong, and (3) that if people are not punished in some way, justice is not served.
The context of war is to win at all costs. Do not admit any weakness. Do not admit any responsibility. As a consequence, when you are faced with a "legal battle," all incentives are to deny responsibility and not say or do anything that may undermine your case or position.
Context and Assumptions of Dispute Resolution Coaching and Peacemaking
Dispute resolution coaching does not take for granted that the assumptions of litigation and war are true. In fact, our clients often seem to do better with an opposite set of assumptions; specifically, we encourage them to: (1) adopt a new worldview that says their “adversaries” are just like them, not good nor evil; (2) take 100% responsibility for being engaged in dispute, instead of focusing on who is right and who is wrong; (3) discover the power of choosing not to "punish" the other party by seeking awards for their damages.
The context of peace is rooted in taking 100% responsibility no matter what. It is a powerful posture arising from spiritual traditions such as "turn the other cheek" and "be the change you want to see in the world."